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Should You Help Your Significant Other Choose Your Engagement Ring?

February 15, 2019

When it comes to wedding rings, everyone’s style is different. Some people know exactly what they want or have dreamed of since they were little. While others, like myself, want to be completely surprised. 

The answer to an engagement proposal shouldn’t be a surprise. It should be a mutual decision. You should both know it is coming but when and how is where the real surprise should be. Couples should communicate about such a momentous event in their lives. With that being said, engagement rings should be treated the same way. When couples begin discussing marriage, the conversation about engagement and wedding rings should be brought up as well. Do you want to be surprised? Do you want to pick out the exact ring? Do you want to give a few different options and let your significant other decide? There is absolutely no right or wrong answer to this. Your preference should be just as unique as your love story. YOU are the one that will be wearing the ring all day for the rest of your life; So why not be involved in deciding on the style?

Shopping Together

If you prefer to choose your own ring (or find options for your significant other to choose from), I recommend looking for both of your rings together. Don’t just try on wedding rings. Have your significant other try on wedding bands too. The act of looking at rings together can be fun and really set the mood. It’s exciting window shopping together and when you both get to look and try on rings together it makes it feel so real. You know… the “omg this is happening!” moment. And let’s be honest; wedding rings are not cheap! So you can rest assured knowing you both got exactly what you want, for the price range you both are comfortable with. Just be sure to decide on a budget before heading to the store. It’s one of the first questions they’ll ask you every time you set foot in a wedding ring store. If you’re unsure, then do a little window shopping first or look online to figure out the prices different styles go for.


You prefer to be completely surprised or like the gesture that your significant other put their own thought into choosing the perfect ring for you. This is just as exciting as choosing your own ring.
For the most part, I love my husband’s style. And in many ways, we have the same style too. So for me, it was easy to leave the engagement ring decision up to him. I told him I didn’t want to know and that I wanted him to choose the one that made him __. As cliche as it may sound, it’s the thought that counts. I love looking at my ring knowing it’s from him and knowing how much thought and effort he put into choosing it for me. So I really didn’t care about the setting or the cut, etc. in the end. All I knew was that I wanted a simple, elegant style ring. I wanted it to be smaller because I have such tiny fingers; I didn’t want anything to look too overwhelming and off balance next to my baby hands. I also didn’t want anything too expensive because I can’t ever seem to justify spending so much money on a ring; To me, the price amount does not parallel the amount of love. With only those guidelines, he chose the most perfect ring ever. The pride and joy that glowed across his face when he showed me the ring he picked out was what made it perfect!

If you want to be surprised then there are some things to consider to avoid any issues. Remember how much pressure this puts on your significant other. Does your partner have good or similar style to yours? Do you have family or good friends that your partner can turn to for questions, second opinions, or hints? Do you have a “lookbook / dream board” for your partner to get ideas from? If you don’t have any of these then just be sure that you’re honestly, genuinely okay with any choice your significant other may choose; Remember that wedding rings aren’t something you can just return or buy a second one of (at least in the short term). So if you do have any hesitation, do both of yourselves the favor and opt to shop together.



By Amber Rose Zubrod
Contributing Writer

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